I may be writing this blog post as a form of revision procrastination, and as a chance to escape the four walls of my uni room that are currently driving me insane. However, as I near the end of my first year at University I thought what better time to talk about my experience.
This time last year I was stressing over the pressure of A2 level exams, having at least one 'mental breakdown' a week from the immense pressure I was putting on myself to get into university. This stress now seems very insignificant a year later as I am sitting my first university exams, wishing I had told my year thirteen self not to stress so much. Don't get me wrong A-Levels are extremely challenging and I would in no way want to do them again however, this past year I have learnt that as long as you try your best they are definitely not worth all the stress.
Throughout my teenage years I was very reserved, maybe a little too reserved. Never speaking up for myself, always keeping quiet and going along with the crowd, which virtually meant that my social life was basically non-existent. Of course I spent time with my friends but whenever I was invited to parties or to sleep over friends house's I would decline due to this nagging anxiety and fear, which I have no idea where it came from. In addition, to this when everyone started turning eighteen and wanting to go out clubbing every weekend I shyed away from every opportunity, too scared to go out and let loose a bit, which now looking back I seriously regret. Which evidently left me isolated, spending every weekend at home, alone, either revising or spending my time on social media. Which at times is great but this seriously affected my moods and confidence.
After receiving the a-level grades that I always wanted I was determined to make a change. I was determined to get rid of this fear, and put myself out there a bit more and my god I have sure done that. I look back at those times I spent feeling so alone and isolated and wonder why I didn't just live a little.
Now a year on I barely recognise the person I was a year ago and I am so so proud of myself for taking those scary steps. However, I definitely wouldn't have been able to do that without coming to university. This year has been one of the best experiences ever, and I would 100% recommend going to university to anyone. Not only because you get to study a subject you're interested in but also because of the social side. In my case throwing myself in the deep end and having to live with people I didn't know was the best thing for me to come out of my shell a bit. My past self would never believe me if I told them that at 19 I would be a major party animal (lol) and enjoying just going out and meeting tonnes of new people. One thing you learn is that (virtually) all uni students end up being major alcoholics during their time at uni, enjoying a wild night out as their break from the stress of uni work and exams, enjoy it while you can! (haha)
As summer approaches I wish I could relive this year all over again, and I am definitely going to be very jealous of all the new freshers as they arrive at university in September, with no idea of what a great time they're going to have. However, I am excited to start second year and everything that the next step will bring with it. I am again determined to meet as many new people as possible and push myself even further to become more confident. Although, I love being at home I have seriously learnt that independence is what I live for hence why I have made as many plans as possible during the four month break, visiting all the new great people that I've met. No way I could spend four months at home again!
If I could give one piece of advice it would be to take chances while you have them, because you never know when you're going to get a chance like that again.
"you have one life to love what you do"
Here's to new beginnings and self belief!
Thanks for reading :)
